I have been introducing my self as "failed vegan" a few times when my diet comes in question when I but soy ice cream, fake lunch meat, or ask if anyone wants to go to Chicago Diner so that I can have their amazing vegan Gyros sandwich.
I have been "omnivoring" for past 3 years or so after dropping the vegetarian diet I had for close to 12 years, one of those years has been a vegan year. I became a vegetarian in 7th grade after reading about animal suffering in a book randomly checked out from the library. A loner, unpopular immigrant child I loved animals more than people anyways. To the horrors of my very meat eating Eastern European family their little oddball decided not to eat the staple of the family diet - meat. Meat was fried, boiled, salted, smoked and baked. Meat was in everything and everywhere. A newly inherited tradition of Thanksgiving revolved around large quantity of meat already present in Eastern European family gatherings with an addition of a large turkey now as well. Sandwiches were rarely made without smoked ham or salami.
I guess I never really cared about what people thought of me. I had no problems telling horrified and confused relatives that I decided that meat is out of my diet due to my concern for farm animals. I was tempted sometimes of course, but determined to not give in.
In 7th grade science fair I presented a poster about how animal experiments are cruel and sometimes not very useful. This was before internet access for me so I had a list of citations from books found in the library. My poster had copies of pictures of tortured animals. I was a little kid who no one could really figure out. Because I looked weird, smelled weird, spoke a weird language and wore clothes that were 10 years out of fashion in United States, not eating what everyone else was didn't make me any more friends. Still though I carried on through grades 6-8 with highschool being slightly better. I had more choices over my food there, even if most lunches it consisted of cheese pizza and fries. I was friends with the weird kids so having a different diet wasn't that much of a biggie.
A year of vegan diet though presented some issues - caloric intake. I was on the swim team as well as orchestra and I would run on weekends. At some points I also did Judo - a very physically demanding martial art. All of these activities as well as a growing body required food and nutrition and calories. It wasn't the weight or how I looked it was more how I felt. I felt tired and cold all the time. I wanted to eat all the time which meant I had to eat whatever was around the house which was usually not that healthy. The fact that potato chips are vegan doesn't make them that great as a snack.
Another factor was that even with fake meat, I realized that dairy was in everything. Everything! Some breads, some vegetarian fake meats, and so on. And sometimes it wasn't even called dairy - you had to look it up on a chart to see what that derivative from dairy was. Casein was just one of many things that was not vegan. After not being able to do it for more than a year, I went back to vegetarian. I realized that I made myself intolerant to milk however. After drinking frozen coffee beverage with milk in it, my insides wanted to kill me.
Not being a fan of milk anyways, I gladly embraced soy milk and later almond milk. To me, it still tastes way better even though I could take some lactaid to allow me to drink it without consequences.
College was not an issue as cafeteria and later my autonomy in the grocery store allowed me to pursue my diet of choice.
After I graduated I decided to open a cafe. With many things coming into place and stars aligning themselves it became possible. And that's where vegetarian ended. After about 2 years of working between 50-80 hour weeks I said "f*ck it". I wanted to have a quick meal whenever I wanted. If I wanted to grab a quick lunch from Wendy's and eat a spicy chicken sandwich after picking up supplies for the cafe, I wanted to just do it. Chicken sandwiches always proved more filling than simple fries. Protein made me feel full faster so that I could focus on running the cafe. I had no time to cook, I had no time to eat or think ahead about food. With a haphazard life and work, vegetarian just ended. A salad with chicken pieces filled me up more that the one with just avocados, a sandwich with some meats filled me up faster than just a cheese sandwich, or a veggie one. It was a matter of time and convenience.
Well coffee shop is now gone. Many many things happened. I am now back in school, I found a job as unrelated to coffee as possible. I most certainly have more time....
Yet somehow I didn't revert back to vegetarian or vegan. I seemed to have settle comfortably in a blissful ignorance still highlighted by limited time and money. Weird. I still blissfully chomp down on BBQ ribs, can't put down hot wings, and I love fried fish. I have seen Food Inc, I have seen Youtube videos and documentaries. But while revulsion and discust last for a bit, if I am under pressure, have time constraints or had a super stressful work or day, I eat meat. All kinds of meat. WTF? I do have more time during the week so what gives? I, of course, consulted the internet. And wow... just type in "failed vegan" and everyone's got an opinion. Sometimes valid, sometimes completely stupid. So while I am not alone in my questions, the atmosphere out there is, lets just say, hostile.
Well so if you made it this far in the blog here is the thing - I want to truly know if vegan diet is the best. And I mean by that the most responsible. There are so many moral, ethical, practical, health related, envoronment related questions that I guess, I decided to write a blog and hopefully hear some opinions while myself keeping an open mind. Having a degree in science does something to your psyche - you want everything to be an experiment. Nothing is real if it's based on heresay. And of course this vegan thing would not be anything fun if it wasn't somehow turned into an experiment. I am hoping in the new year to get a blood test as I am currently, eliminate all animal products for a month or 2, follow a sane vegan diet and then see what happens. Because I don't think that either omnivore or vegan diets are unhealthy in themselves I am keeping an open mind to everything.
Meanwhile though, while I can't really afford a full blood test of everything, I want to explore some controversies, try some recipes and get some opinions on the vegan/non-vegan topic. There are also a lot of vegan diet mutations now too... like raw, or some religious diet, prehistoric diet, and so on. I am hoping to experiment with those too. I mean what good is having a body if you can't experiment on it.
I am hoping for comments from everyone. I am hoping to keep things interesting. If it gets boring, let me know. Hopefully you find it as fun to read as I do to write!
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